Did she really think this was a good idea? Really?!
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Mummy: I have to take baby outside, but my legs are so tired. Whatever shall I do?
Nanny: [sarcastically] You could drive it around in the Range Rover and hang its head out the window.
Mummy: Hmmmm.
Nanny: [feign excitement] OR you could get on your yuppie Segway and push its stroller that way.
Mummy: Oh, Nanny. What would I do without your brilliant ideas?
Nanny: I don't know. Act like a normal person? Eh, probably not.
A while back, a good friend of mine, Dave, told me some surprising and disturbing news. He said that a sitcom was being developed centered around the fat guy from the Dytec commercials. Not only that, he would also play his mother as well (Oh, and his catchphrase would be "Lost another one to Dytec!"). I wouldn't believe it. It was too ridiculous and absurd. Well, we would go out to parties, clubs, bars and bathhouses and Dave would somehow bring up the Dytec guy and his new show to people we'd meet. I thought to myself "why does he keep saying this?" Why would they produce a sitcom or any series for that matter around a commercial character. It finally turned out to be false (for future reference, if Dave says something completely outrageous and silly, it's probably not true. He thinks its funny.) I mean, c'mon. The Dytec guy was a one-line wonder with no substance (figuratively, obviously. Physically he has a lot of substance... because he's fat.)
Well, I'm sure Dave will be thrilled at the following news, but I loathe the person/people who even came up with these characters: ABC picked up for their fall schedule--not mid-season, mind you--a show based around the cavemen from the GEICO commercials. The show aptly titled, Cavemen, will star the 3 well-spoken, neanderthals from the commercial who try to live in a world where they are stereotyped as being unintelligent and uncouth. If this show makes it past its first season, then TV is in a sorrier state than in its current form.
For a taste of what's to come here is a clip from the show, Cavemen.
Bunny's comin' ta getcha.
The Republican debate earlier this week shows just how far politicians will go to gain 9/11 sympathy. In the debate Rep. Ron Paul said, "Have you ever read about the reasons they attacked us? They attack us because we've been over there. We've been bombing Iraq for 10 years." When you make a comment like that, expect someone to chime in and shout "9/11." Rudy Guiliani does shine here... at being a fucktard. Over 5 years later he's still trying to ride the coattails of 9/11. He lambasts Rep. Paul for even thinking that the events of September 11 could have been at least partially caused by America's foreign policy initiatives:
"That's really an extraordinary statement," said Giuliani. "As someone who lived through the attack of September 11, that we invited the attack because we were attacking Iraq; I don't think I've ever heard that before and I've heard some pretty absurd explanations for September 11."Thinking logically, why would terrorist want to hurt us if we weren't bothering them in the first place? Sometime we fail to realize that even though terrorists are radical in their methods, it doesn't mean they always do things without reason.
CNN's Roland Martin posted a great commentary including an insightful history lesson regarding American-Iranian relations. He believes a debate is necessary and not a condemnation of Rep. Paul's comments.
Guliani did a fine job with New York City, but I'd be scared if he was sworn in as our next president.
Remember back in college when you and 2 of your nerdlinger friends would crowd around the computer? Your finger was hovering over the "A" key, Dorkmeister #2 was frantically waiting to smash the Space Bar and No Life Louie was being a little to keystroke happy with the Quotation Mark key. Cookie would shout at you that you were dumb and needed to get out more, and also wished you a happy Coming Out Day on October 11 every year. If you recognize any of this, then you played You Don't Know Jack. And you only had 2 friends. And those friends only had each other. GAY!
Well, after a long hiatus, YDKJ is back and it's on the internets. Every Monday, Cookie Masterson hosts a new game consisting of 7 pop culture questions, which include Dis or Dat and the Jack Attack. From Tuesday through Friday, YDKJ delivers a new Dis or Dat loosely taken from current events in politics and entertainment. I'm hoping they come out with a full fledged internet version with all the insulting and jibing... because I don't spend enough time in front of the computer.
Here is my obligatory "first post" paragraph:
ZOMG!!! THIS IS MY FIRST POST IN THIS BLOG I'M SO EXCITED I'M GOING TO WRITE ABOUT THE WORLD AND MAKE IT A BETTER PLACE WHO KNOWS WHAT THE FUTURE BRINGS IT'LL BE EXCITING AND AWESOME AND SUPER COOL ALL BECAUSE I'M WRITING THIS LOLOLOLOLOL
/end rant
On with the show.
I'm popping around Defamer and come across this post: Defamer First Look: The 'Kid Nation' Preview. What first strikes you is this picture:
Your first thought is, "What the hell is going on? Why are those kids wailing on this other kid and why am I not part of the action?" It's disturbing in a good way. You want to know why Yellow Bandana Boy (YBB) deserved it (because he obviously deserved it). The blog post portrays CBS's "Kid Nation" as a throw-40-kids-in-the-wild-without-supervision-and-tape-what-happens-when-kids-stop-being-polite-and-start-living-like-their-parents-lord-of-the-flies tasteful program, but it's actually something quite boring. CBS put kids in a ghost town in New Mexico and to see if they can form a workable society. As the host puts it, "Can they [the children] succeed where adults have failed?" Sure, when the incentive is a $20,000 gold star (Seriously. A gold effing star.) handed out at every town meeting. $20,000. Um, you want me to go running around the city naked with a ring-toss butt plug crammed up my bum? Because I'll do it.
Oh, and the picture: those kids that look like they're rushing to YBB to kick his ass are really just rushing YBB to hug him, because he wants to go home because his brother is in a wheelchair or dying or something silly. Can I get a 'vomit'?
